Why "Just chill" isn't good advice – how to truly calm your nervous system

Reading time: 8 minutes

You know the feeling: a long day, a full mind, a body buzzing with energy. And someone says, "Just chill." They mean well. But it doesn't help.

Anyone who understands stress knows why: chronic stress isn't a state you can simply end by intention. It's the result of a nervous system that can no longer disengage from alarm mode – not because you don't want to relax, but because your body has forgotten how to use the brakes.

This article explains what truly happens in the nervous system when stress becomes chronic, why classic stress-relief advice often only scratches the surface, and what it takes to calm the nervous system sustainably.

The nervous system has two modes – and one of them is currently working overtime

The autonomic nervous system automatically regulates what you cannot consciously control: heartbeat, breathing rate, digestion, immune response. It operates through two antagonists:

The sympathetic nervous system is your activation system. It puts the body on alert with signals such as increased pulse, shallower breathing, and muscle tension. Evolutionarily, it was developed for short-term threats: fight or flight, reaction to a real danger, followed by an all-clear.

The parasympathetic nervous system is your regeneration system. It activates the "rest-and-digest" mode. Heart rate drops, digestion starts, muscles relax. In this state, your body can recover, build resources, and regulate itself.

The problem with modern lifestyles: The sympathetic nervous system is constantly activated – by deadlines, screen time, noise, information overload, lack of breaks. At the same time, the parasympathetic nervous system rarely gets a chance to truly kick in.¹

The result is not a short-term stress state. The nervous system remains in a heightened state of arousal, even long after the actual threat has passed.

Chronic Stress: What happens in the body

When the sympathetic nervous system dominates for hours, days, and months, a cascade of biological reactions follows, extending far beyond the subjective "feeling of stress."

Cortisol as a constant signal

The stress response involves the release of cortisol from the adrenal cortex. In the short term, this is beneficial: cortisol mobilizes energy, sharpens attention, and dampens inflammation. However, with prolonged elevation, cortisol has the opposite effect: it impairs sleep quality, inhibits the immune response, and can disrupt the regulation of the nervous system itself.²

The silent exhaustion

Many people with chronically elevated stress levels don't report classic exhaustion, but rather a different state: they are physically tired but internally awake. Inner restlessness, a constantly active mind, or the feeling of not being able to truly switch off. All of these are typical signs of a nervous system that can no longer reliably find the brakes. Behind this lies a biological dysregulation.

Impact on sleep and regeneration

Deep, restorative sleep requires an active parasympathetic nervous system. Those who remain under sympathetic dominance in the evening may get enough sleep, but it will be in a shallower, less regenerative mode. The result is exhaustion despite sleep.³

The nervous system's brake: Why GABA is so important

For the nervous system to switch into rest mode at all, it needs a functioning neurological brake. The neurotransmitter GABA (gamma-aminobutyric acid) plays a central role here.

GABA is the most important inhibitory neurotransmitter in the central nervous system. Its job is to dampen neuronal activity. In concrete terms: GABA makes the noise quieter. If GABA activity is sufficient, the nervous system can downregulate. If it is too low, or if the receptors do not respond sufficiently, the system remains in a heightened state of arousal.⁴

Chronic stress is associated with altered GABAergic activity. This mechanism is well documented in depression and anxiety research and explains why affected individuals remain internally tense despite external relaxation stimuli.⁴

What this means for classic relaxation approaches

Breathing exercises, meditation, and movement are useful tools to activate the parasympathetic nervous system. They work via the vagus nerve, breathing rate, and proprioceptive stimuli. Those who regularly practice these exercises can actively stimulate their vagus nerve and improve the switching ability of the nervous system.

However, they do not directly address the biochemical basis: neurotransmitter availability, receptor sensitivity, and the nutrient status that the nervous system needs as its operating foundation.

Why some adaptogens don't work

Anyone who deals with stress management will sooner or later come across adaptogens. These are plant-based compounds that are supposed to help the body better tolerate stress. The most well-known are Ashwagandha and Rhodiola rosea.

The effect of Ashwagandha (Withania somnifera) is well documented. Several clinical studies show that standardized extracts can reduce individual stress perception and cortisol levels in chronically stressed subjects.⁵ The effect of Rhodiola rosea has also been clinically investigated: studies show effects on mental exhaustion and cognitive performance under stress.⁶

And yet many people report that adaptogens "do nothing" for them. One possible reason: Adaptogens primarily address the HPA axis (hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis) – i.e., the hormonal stress response. They influence how strongly cortisol is released in response to a stressor. However, they do not strengthen the GABAergic brake and do not provide neurotransmitter precursors that the nervous system needs for rest mode.

This does not mean that adaptogens have no value. A chronically overstimulated nervous system may need more than a single lever.

A different approach: Calming the nervous system on multiple levels

The nervous system is not a switch that can be flipped from the outside. It is a system that relies on various levels to regulate itself.

Level 1: Neuronal signals

Direct influences on the autonomic nervous system – via breathing, vagus nerve stimulation, movement, cold or heat stimuli. These signals inform the brain that the situation is safe and switching is permitted.

Level 2: Biochemical basis

The nervous system requires specific micronutrients and amino acids to synthesize neurotransmitters, maintain receptors, and sustain signal transmission. If these foundations are lacking, the system cannot regulate optimally, regardless of how many breathing exercises are performed.

Level 3: Structural regulation

Long-term recovery does not come from isolated moments of relaxation, but from regular, rhythmic alternation between activation and rest. Systematically creating space for this rhythm, e.g., through routines, conscious breaks, or sleep hygiene, supports the nervous system's adaptability.

What magnesium has to do with nervous stress

Magnesium is involved in over 300 enzymatic processes in the body, including the regulation of NMDA receptors, which play a role in excitatory transmission, and the function of GABA receptors.⁷ At the same time, magnesium is consumed more rapidly and excreted via the kidneys under chronic stress.⁸

According to the National Food Consumption Study II by the Max Rubner Institute, significant proportions of the German population do not meet the recommended daily intake for magnesium.⁹ It is a fundamental substance that the nervous system needs for its normal function. Magnesium thus contributes to the normal functioning of the nervous system.¹⁰

The effects of L-theanine and other amino acids

In addition to magnesium, there are other substances being researched in the context of nervous system regulation:

• L-theanine, an amino acid naturally found in green tea, is associated with GABAergic activity in research. Several studies show that L-theanine promotes alpha brain waves – a pattern associated with a waking but relaxed state – without sedative effects.¹¹
• L-glycine is the smallest proteinogenic amino acid and an important inhibitory neurotransmitter in the spinal cord and brainstem. Research suggests that L-glycine can improve sleep quality by regulating body temperature and aiding in falling asleep.¹²
• L-arginine and L-lysine play a role in the synthesis of nitric oxide (NO) – a signaling molecule that influences vascular dilation and blood flow, among other things. Some studies suggest a stress-reducing effect of the combination of L-arginine and L-lysine, possibly through influences on cortisol and anxiety response.¹³
• Folate (Vitamin B9) contributes to normal psychological function¹⁰ and acts as a cofactor in neurotransmitter synthesis.

Two complementary mechanisms

What distinguishes this combination of active ingredients is that it addresses two different levels simultaneously: on the one hand, the GABAergic brake – the nervous system's ability to actively dampen neuronal excitation (L-theanine, L-glycine, magnesium). On the other hand, NO-mediated blood flow – the vascular basis that supplies the brain and nervous system with oxygen and nutrients (L-arginine, L-lysine). A system that only targets one of these levers works incompletely. By strengthening both the neurological brake and securing the supply base, the nervous system is supported on two levels – this is the crucial difference from approaches that consider individual substances in isolation.

What does all this mean in practice?

An overstimulated nervous system doesn't need a quick fix, but a consistent strategy. The most important building blocks for this are:

Regular vagus nerve activation

Conscious breathing exercises, cold stimuli, slow humming or singing – all of this activates the vagus nerve and strengthens parasympathetic activity. You've already learned how to stimulate your vagus nerve with three simple exercises in the third section of this article.

Ensuring a micronutrient foundation

Magnesium, B vitamins, and adequate amino acid intake are not about performance optimization – they are essential for operation. Anyone who doesn't cover this basic need is working with a structurally undersupplied system.

Sleep and evening routine as a system reset

The evening hours are the natural opportunity for the parasympathetic nervous system. Those who consistently reduce stimuli here and give the body signals for rest improve regeneration quality structurally – not just for one night.

Building a rhythm

Relaxation is a pattern that can become a habit through repetition. The nervous system can thus be trained to switch between activation and rest more quickly and reliably.

Key to this are fixed time windows for activation (work, training, stimuli) and for rest (breathing exercises, darkness, no screens), which accustom the system to the same rhythm daily. Not the intensity of the individual relaxation measure is decisive, but its regularity.

Breathing exercises, vagus nerve stimulation, and sleep hygiene are effective approaches even without supplements – they address the neuronal level directly. Supplements can provide support where the nutrient foundation is incomplete. Neither replaces the other; both together work towards the same state.

Conclusion

"Just chill" is not a bad wish. But it's not an instruction that the nervous system can simply follow.

Chronic stress can structurally alter the nervous system: it shifts the balance between the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems, affects GABAergic activity, and depletes biochemical resources. To sustainably calm the nervous system, a strategy that addresses both neuronal and biochemical levels is needed.

The good news: The nervous system is plastic. It can re-learn to switch into rest mode – if it receives the right signals, has the right foundation, and ample opportunity to practice the switch.

References

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Transparency note: This article was created by our editor Jonas with the help of AI and subsequently edited.